You can have the world in the palm of your hands and still may drop it
Your heart just might beat real fast
That text might stop it
Compliments just might fill up ya head
That man gon pop it
It don’t matter just honest ya are
Your phone ? You gon lock it
Been in bed for a while done a lot of cryin
In my head for while think I’m kinda dyin
In the world, yeah I smile
Think I’m tired of tryin
Yeah I talk, yeah I laugh
Lots of internal sighin
I’m sick of it, it’s bullshit man
Depression doesn’t care about the date
That’s why you stay late
And a dollar short
Unforgivable
I just wanna feel better
But it’s gonna take forever
The burdens of my past
Hold me down like a fetter
The tears flow inside
So outside I seem put together
Suicide ? Never
At least not literally
But if I’m dead inside
I already died mentally
Look at me
I am the epitome
Of the enemy
Scared of closets full of monsters
But now those monsters are friends to me
There once was a girl
And she was normal
Then she wasn’t
And she was brave
Then she was scared
But most of all
She aware
That THERE
Isn’t a place she should ever step into
Or she’ll repeat the cycle
And she’ll
Be spiteful
Bc she knows better
So she got back to normal
Then she had a nightmare
And she wasn’t normal
Well it wasn’t a dream
It was a flashback
A trigger
But all the same
She ran out of brave
And her fears got bigger
But she still didn’t go
Bc better did she know
That if she goes
She may never come back
So she wipes her tears
And conquered her fears
So she could get back on track
And she was normal
Then she wasn’t
And she started to sense a pattern
A theme
It’s like a big scheme
Except for why would anyone
Bother with little old me
She was scared
Plain scared
And although she knew better
Unprepared
And when she got there
She just stared
Until she crossed over
It is hard to be without the ones you love
Even if it’s for the better.
Better late than never.
But better never, if ever
If it means we aren’t together.
Where are you now ?
Everywhere ?
Nowhere ?
If I scream Marco, will a Polo appear ?
I miss you always then I miss you more
I know that you’re gone
I just can’t be sure
I still text you. I snap you. I knock on your door.
This is the moment we’ve all been waiting for.
Now revealing God and guest staring Max
I’m unaware it’s a dream and I cannot relax
But is it ? Where are you ?
Are you everywhere or nowhere ?
Is God even real ?
Do you just see it on my face or can you feel what I feel ?
Can you heal what I feel ?
My thoughts reveal a shield behind the steering wheel.
I just wanna see you one more time.
I thought we had more time.
Where are you ?
I don’t know. So I drive.
I drive and I hope I crash and I hope I see you when I die.
But your thoughts are a shield too so I don’t even try.
I just wish you were here. Where are you ???
Can you see me crying ?
Can you see me tryna grieve your dying ?
I don’t know how.
I thought I did bc I’ve seen death before
I’ve kissed death before but I’m not sure now
It’s been a while
Why does it still hurt like yesterday ?
Why do I see flashes of your bloody boot on replay ?
Please God PLEASE just show me the way
I want to be okay
I mean I’m mostly okay
And then I get alone
And it’s hard and I start thinking and I stop blinking
And I’m not sure if I should be on my own.
Where are you ? Can you read this ?
Can you show me a sign on how to defeat this ?
On how I can at least tweak
And not into life, speak it.
Who can I blame ?
I’m angry. At who ?
I don’t know. At me and at you.
Where are you ?
